Kissing the Death

A re-post of my original post that I posted sometime back on my blog. 🙂 Hope you enjoy this, and find it not too offensive. Consider it my small,  humble and wishful attempt to be back on MoTA. 😉 :p

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Though I’ve seen many dear and near ones pass me by in my life, I’ve never written about death before. For, I never knew what it would feel like – until recently.

I feel lucky to have passed through this experience. Its hard to describe it in the generic context of duality of good or bad, because there is no such thing. It just is.

So, it was my friend’s birthday, and we were hoping to get high. Little did I know what I was going to face then. Though it wasn’t first time, it could have been last time.

I inhaled a few black clouds, enjoying the state of consciousness, puzzled with dizziness. My friend couldn’t take in much, and was constantly telling how badly rolled it was. :p

So I would take in more and more, and explain him how he was doing it wrong.

Then, in an instance, I felt a sudden whip of utter dizziness. Wham! And I said, “I can feel it so strong, why can’t you..” And went in another breathe. Wham!!! I was getting dizzy and high, and I mentioned I can’t take it anymore – I’m as high as heavens.

He gets a call, and goes away for a while.

Wham!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who.. what.. where.. why… how…

I could sense how my senses were loosing their control. Starting with sight. I could see things, but not really make sense with them. Another few seconds, and it started feeling numb first in my brain, then legs, arms, chest, heart and everything else… and I could sense my whole body vibrating from within – feeling like a thunderbolt of millions of watts is passing through me. It was all numb, yet filled with extreme energy. Pure consciousness. Oneness.

I crossed all my fingers of my hands, and folded and pressed my hands, and noticed myself gripping them so hard I could not separate easily. I felt discomfort in my stomach, lungs and heart. I felt my heartbeats dropping down.

I noticed I was loosing it, and I was sure I won’t make it through. With great difficulty, I shouted at my friend to bring me some water.. and I didn’t know why I did this. He was gone for almost a few centuries, which he later told me were only a few minutes. I was sweating bullets. I was not breathing unless I made conscious efforts at doing so. Sitting in the front of the car, I took my shirt off. Still sweating – and probably dehydrating.

I felt these were the last moments. The past memories flew by me. I remembered the ones I love. I uttered their names. I sensed that so many things will go unsaid, undone, untold, unheard, non-existed. A deep sigh, with a glimpse of tears in eyes, with realization that nothing actually matters – its all momentary. And I was one of those fabrics that created the moments that were. I sensed I could either end up in a hospital, in a police station, or in a graveyard. Chances were high that it could be the last one.

I am a non-believer. But then, when it was one of those last moments when death could have kissed me, I surprisingly uttered OM / AUM sound.. loudly… several times. I did it like it was the last but only thing I had to do. It felt like I’m bringing in, calling for, triggering some energies – within and beyond – that will spark it all up again. After all, as I’ve learned it later, sound does not exist. It is just an impression in mind created by the energy waves or oscillations.

So there I was.. waiting for the last sip of water to go in – and may be then bid a farewell to this reality and to possibly enter another..!??!?

But then came my friend, bringing in the water bottle, giving it to me unopened while talking on phone!!!!@!!@@$#@

I tried to tell him to open it for me. But I had little control over my voice, and it went a little too loud. He then recognized the situation was probably already out of control, and turned the call off.

He opened the bottle for me. I drank a few sips. A sudden discomfort inside the body… like it was telling itself there is something wrong. Someone isn’t able to take in a fucking breathe!!!!! I continued drinking, a few more sips, and then suddenly… the stomach responded. :))

“PUKE!!!!! Puke the fuck out of this asshole. Anything that is in his belly. Just puke the fuck out, so that his lungs can get some space to take the fucking breathe in!!!!” – screamed the amazing molecular superstructure of my body to all of its microcosms.

“Okay.. a little more.. PUKE. The roads of this city are already in bad condition, nothing can go worse. PUKE.” the microcosm responded. 😀

I slowly recovered back to my senses. And felt the beauty of life again. Calmness. Wisdom. Oneness.

I sworn to myself to respect this fucking life (which I do anyways, but still, reaffirming 😉 ). I sworn to say what must be said, to do what must be done, to love who must be loved. For, I realized that the only thing that could probably hold you back from the ultimate bliss and freedom is the times when you disobeyed the call of your heart.

Love. Live.

~ Ronak R. / RokZRooM


I need Lyricist, Singers! Can you guys help me ASAP?

Hey fellow MoTA-ites!! Its been a long time since I wrote something. I’ve really been much occupied with music recently.

And, I found myself stuck with this current project; where I need to make a song in 4 languages!!!! :-O

Well, its for a client of my new venture mQube, and the lyrics are ready in Hindi and I expect to receive Gujarati Lyrics real soon from Smrutz. Now, I want someone who can help us translate / create Telugu and Marathi lyrics.

What I need: Telugu Lyricist, Native Telugu Singer, Marathi Lyricist, Native Marathi Singer

If you can help me, please drop a line to [] and I’ll get back to you personally.

Thanks in advance to Divenita and SmrutzThoughts, who are already helping me in the same! The deadline of this whole project is just in 10 days; so I expect the lyrics to be ready in around 3 days, and singers to record and send me the vocals in next 7 days.

Tough job. Sharp deadline I know. 😦 But, I’ll be sending you Hindi version’s rough demo as well, so that it makes things easier. And, with my venture mQube; my idea is to share the rewards to all the participants fairly and also have them with me in future projects. You will also get credits whenever / wherever we get it. 🙂 And, of course, this is going to be a nice opportunity!

If you have any queries, PLEASE ask ASAP! Can anyone help me? Savs?? Lax?? 😛

THANKS A GAZILLION TIMES TO KK… For inspiring me to write a Post here!! 😀

Thanks in advance! Stay good. Do good.

~ Ronak R. / RokZRooM

The Slow Poisoning of India

While stumbling upon the net, I discovered this shocking documentary / story that reveals facts about a terrible issue.. which may lead us all to nation-wide disastrous health issues!

Don’t know how far it is true “officially”, or how huge a damage it has already done to our nation, but, watch it yourself to know & judge.

A 25 minute video with shocking facts. May be WE are the ones who can spread the awareness through our MoTA platform!?

Ronak R. / RokZRooM
Living Through Music

Holy Reprise

Apart from my keen enthusiasm for Astronomy, Physics & Music; I spent most of my childhood reading one of my all time favorite magazines – Safari and being astonished by the true stories it unveiled. The specialty of the magazine was its stunning representation of the fact, simple and captivating. But, truth isn’t always good.

The war stories of India with various neighbor-nations was one of its unique and best-selling concept. I’ve read most of them. But, the enjoyment of victorious battles or the sadness of defeats that came along often led to a retrospect. And, I realized that most of the wars that we engaged in ( – especially those involving India and Pakistan), were never really meant to start. Of course, the pressure and suppressed rage could never hold the fire forever. But, the roots of these all lied long long long back.. in the history of these nations.

I wouldn’t like to repeat the facts that can once again lead to the same arguments, but just highlight a simple dream that I visualized while learning these historical facts.

Can the errors be undone? How would the present have been if there wasn’t any partition? May be after some more struggle and somewhat more sustained period of pain, could we have not build one of the strongest & richest nation for us all? Where did we go wrong? What decision did we fail to execute? Why do we still have to suffer? Can not we reunite?

Here’s a small dedication, along with this belief, to all the countrymen of both the nations. My attempt to recreate Pakistan’s beautiful national anthem.

Feel my dream.

Holy Reprise by RokZRooM

With Love, from India. :’-)

* This theme was recreated by me as  a part of the project Rebrand Pakistan, conceptualized & initiated by Amir Anzur.

~ Ronak R. / RokZRooM

A Story Through Music – Shattered

Haven’t posted anything in a while, so I thought, I’d rather post some music I made sometime back.

Its a slow, sad piece straight from the heart… a soundtrack in rough format. Will be part of the new album Life Keys, to be released near the year-end.

Title: Shattered

Album: Life Keys

Artist: RokZRooM

Genre: Soundtrack

Let me know how you feel, what ideas come to you as you listen! 🙂 If you like the idea of sharing new music like this, I’ll put more of such work in progress / demos here. 😀


Keep Rockin’!


Ronak R. / RokZRooM

One Step

Long time back I saw a song on VH1, titled “The Importance of Being Idle”. Not that I fell in love with the song, but the message was excellent. When you’ve got nothing to do, whatever your do would most probably be the reflection of your inner desire, or as Steve Jobs had put it, “…somehow your heart already knows what you want!”

Sorry for not being around much, but you may agree how difficult it is in such times… a blank and bleak state of conscience, seeking desparetely for a ray of hope. You may just not know which step it is that can take you to the destination you really desire. You may even be unaware of that desire itself.

What to do?

Well, Enigma has already sang it, in the song Goodbye Milky Way – “Follow your heart, believe in faith..”;  I strongly recommend listening to this song, for a better, bigger vision that it helps listener visualize… dream big…here’s a the lyrics:

“Goodbye Milky Way”

Shall I go, shall I stay
107 light years away
many times, so many doubts
But no reason to talk about

Mission is over, mission is done
I will miss you, children of the sun
But it’s time to go away
Goodbye milky way

For a better world without hate
Follow your heart, believe in fate
Only visions and the mind
Will guide you to the light

Mission is over mission is done
I will miss you children of the sun
But it’s time to go away
Goodbye milky way

Mission is over, mission is done
I will miss you children of the sun
I go home until someday
I say goodbye, goodbye milky way

In 5 bilions years the Andromeda galaxy will collide with our milky way
A new gigantic Cosmic world will be born

So, I thought lets not think for a while, and just do… act.  🙂

And I spent some 17000 Rs. to buy a midi controller.. thinking may be its the next step. Got it yesterday! And started believing in my dream again!

Roland Edirol PCR 300
Roland Edirol PCR 300

When you think of what’s to gain, or to loose. When you weigh the bet, its seems its not easy. Its not meant to be. But when you think again, nothing else really matters. Everything else is secondary!

Toughest thing about any change that one desires, is to act upon it. But all it takes is a little courage, and the first few steps – One step at a time. And,to learn THIS, you got to be sitting idle for more than a while. 😉

Let’s see where does it take me.


And that’s how I live through Music!

Ronak R. / RokZRooM / WordPress

Terminator – Salvation

Terminator - Salvation

Terminator - Salvation


I could never watch a movie that I wanted to so badly in its first day first show! And a very few of the big-screen experiences I’ve had till date could deliver such a passion, thrill.. excitement!! Real entertainer!!

Its year 2018. The Skynet has taken over the control of Global weapon system, and most of the colonies the human race have developed so far are ruined to ashes. Except some underground existence of human race, only thing found on the land is debris of the devastated human marvels. Amongst these ruins lives the resistance, the secret army confined in scattered hideouts, with a common goal to destroy Skynet and a complete faith in John Connor.

But, the culprits behind the Skynet had already started its extreme version of Terminator. Marcus. The dashing, handsome hunk was once sentenced to death in 2003. But, he was revived later, upon his agreement to donate his body for R&D. The new Cyborg incarnation of Marcus with a body of bolts aimed to jolt has a brain and heart of a man.

Will John Connor and his army be able to destroy the Skynet? Or, the Marcus’ heart will be overridden by the purpose he’s remade to serve – genocide of human race?

Absolutely stunning graphics. Signature soundtrack with a qualitative reincarnation of the music (don’t miss shockingly awesome introductory music) and sound effects. A solid story line that a hard-core terminator fan OR any Sci-Fi fan would expect with an apt screenplay required for the plot to be perfectly generated. The second half slows down a bit, becoming a little draggy if you’re not connected with the storyline.. but worth watching for a hell-bent entertaining, its a great action thriller of the summer of ’09.

A must watch on the big screen. I’d rate this movie 8/10.

Ronak R. / RokZRooM